Red Notebook: September 19, 2002

September 15, 2002

I helped B catch crickets tonite.
I have a very keen sense of hearing when it comes to crickets, which is odd because usually I can’t hear a damn anybody says otherwise. I found them and he caught them. It was fun.
I worked some more on my Dogma essay tonite. Ugh! It just fills like it’s not going anywhere. Like it’s a non-sensical raving. Like, who the hell is gonna read this? It definitely has that who care? factor.
I can’t stand being by people anymore. This cold has made me more irritable than usual.
For my Artist’s Day, I worked on the font for Kirsi’s present. I’m really anxious on working on the rough draft of it. The hard part comes when dealing with canvas and thread colour; size isn’t the issue. If the colours don’t work, then I’m fucked. Can’t wait to see the postage bill on THIS sucker. But, it’s the best I can do. I just hope she doesn’t change her quote anytime soon. Ah that would suck!
Cheers.
J. Didn’t I tell you she was funny?

Red Notebook: September 14, 2002

September 14, 2002

Kirsi’s video didn’t work. Gawd dammit.
That is so typical. I want to spend my Saturday night in total and utterly complete bliss, but no! The damn thing decides not to work. Poor girl. She took all that time to make me a copy, and I can’t imagine how much they spiked her for postage.
Oh well. I have my Dogma. I could watch it over and over again and just marvel.
Linds and I watched Amélie today. It was Really good! I was VERY impressed. I thought I wouldn’t be able to follow it, seeing how it’s in subtitles, but most of it was narrated, so it wasn’t hard.
I saw that play tonite, Three Tall Women. Oh, boo! Thank Gawd it was free, because it never would have been worth the ticket price. I felt bad for the actors though. Oh well. Not everything can be Private Lives. Ugh! I’m STILL pissed off for not getting to see it. Maybe it McBeth comes to the States, I’ll treat myself to a trip to New York. And someday if I’m rich, I can afford to stalk Alan Rickman.
Leah called me at 10:30 last night whilst the guys were over. I was SO mad. I wish she’d go away. She’s got her job and I’ve got my nothingness life, and that’s how it should be.
Cheers.
J. Didn’t I tell you she was funny?

Red Notebook: September 12, 2002

September 12, 2002

All I can think of is Dogma. I mean, maybe I need to find a new hobby. “Then again,” I’m looking forward to writing this sucker.
I have to write an essay on a movie, book, song, show, etc. that has impacted me. At first, I was going to use Patriot games as my basis into my encouragement of the Republic against the British, but now I’ve simply changed it to Dogma. The thing that worries me, is I have so many points that I want to address that it’s going to be longer than Hell. On top of that, the Prof wants us to write in detail about us and our whereabouts, which is going to make it even longer! Oh well. He asked for it. :-) At least the ladies t TARF will be proud. I’m going to post it on the board when it’s done, and although it’s not an absolute profession of my “undying devotion,” it will touch on the original reason for seeing Dogma, that of course being Alan Rickman.
Why me? The world is so fucking unfair.
You know what pissed me off yesterday? This girl in my theatre class was ripping on our production of WoZ (She’s from St. Mary’s). Despite the fact that we didn’t have the finances to do everything we wanted to, we still put on a good show. And I KICKED ASS. I stole the show. I was brilliant. Why did she say that? She and her pompous friends can go straight to fucking Hell. I, of course, being Miss Bottled Up, didn’t tell her I was from Menasha, didn’t tell her I was in the show, didn’t tell her to shut the fuck up. I guess my argument would be that it was early and I was too damn tired to start an argument with her.
My head hurts. Really bad. It’s not a migraine, but it’s one of those bitch of a sinus headaches. The kind where you wish you had a drill and just drill a hole from one side of your sinus to the other. Or drill a hole in your eye or right under the eyebrow bone.
It’s one of the few times where masochism doesn’t work.
I’m still in mourning over not getting to see Private Lives. Noooo, I had to see something fucking dumb whilst people in New Jersey seeing it for the fourth time.
Cheers.
J. Didn’t I tell you she was funny?

Red Notebook: September 11, 2002

September 11, 2002

I got Kirsi’s OWL today! I’m so excited to watch this mofo. She sent me a VHS of the Charlie Rose interview. I’ll tell you, the girls at TARF are so incredibly sweet, it’s so amazing. And Kirsi lives in Israel* for Gawd’s sake. Can you imagine the postage on this thing? Know what else she sent me? A little laminated picture of Snape! I was going to put it in my wallet for good luck, but I can’t stand the thought of losing it, so I tacked it up on my computer monitor. Can’t wait till my mom sees it. Heehee!
I hate school. I feel like I’m wasting my life. I mean, I don’t get to see my mom hardly, and I live in her house! And my best guy friend Brietzke? I never get to see him. We both got to school and we both live with our parents, but we don’t get a chance to hang out anymore.
On Friday, I hung out with Dana. We have the best conversations. That’s when I miss her the most. In fact, and I thought about this, I don’t miss any of them. Hell, Lindsay came here last weekend and we spent an hour together and it was so...boring. With Dana, it’s different because we’re both so different, and when we don’t see each other for a while, we have a lot to talk about when we do.
Cheers.
J. Didn’t I tell you she was funny?



*Mistake. She lives in Finland.

Red Notebook: September 10, 2002

September 10, 2002

Things to address today.

Theatre Quiz: I don’t think I did too bad. If I added correctly. I got two wrong. I can’t believe I got the one wrong, “How many children did Laios have?” NONE...Duh, you FUCKING DOLT! Oedipus? Hello. Shit, you are such a fucking moron. Oh well. That’s in the past. Face the demon. Let it go.
FREE CELL BREAK

I didn’t get to audition tonite. Nope. My school schedule conflicts with the rehearsal schedule, so that brings about the end of my career and occupation as an actor at UW Fox. But, I keep telling myself that Mr. Alan Rickman didn’t get the part to that one flick...what was it? Liaisons Dangerous or some shit. Had he gotten the part and not John Malkovich, he NEVER would have gotten the part in DIE HARD, something I would have considered a great injustice.
Oh Mr. Rickman sir...how do you do it? I mean, I could have handled being told I sucked and there was no way in Hell I would get a part, but I didn’t even get to read. Actually, I feel a great weight’s been lifted off my shoulders...so why do I feel so depressed? I hope it’s PMS. I don’t want this to bum me out. I won’t let it. I’m too good for this shit anyway, and I believe it.
Cheers.
J. Didn’t I tell you she was funny?

Red Notebook: September 9, 2002

September 9, 2002

Tonite, I attended my first poetry reading. Can you believe it? Me, of all people, at a poetry reading. It was actually sort of interesting. I kind of had this idea in my mind of what I though it would be like: some guy getting up in front of a bunch of people, reciting poem after poem about shit I could care less about. Endless and daunting; an otherwise waste of time. But the guy, Jonathon Johnson was loud, articulate, funny, and VERY insightful. During the Q&A segment, I asked him how to cure writer's block. I have to try it sometime. He’s just a really nice guy.
Let’s see...I have this Oedipus quiz tomorrow...grr. I’ve heard stories about these quizzes. I’ve been through the story and my notes what seems like a hundred times. You know what? Fuck it. If I don’t know it now, I won’t know it tomorrow. But I think I have a pretty good grasp on it though. I actually like the story! It was very easy to understand (compared to Shakespeare) and everything was so intertwined. You know, I’m actually looking forward to failing it. That way I’ll know what to expect next time.
Auditions are tomorrow. Wish me luck ladies.
I swear my handwriting gets weirder and weirder.
Cheers.
J. Didn’t I tell you she was funny?

Introduction

I deleted my two previous blogs because I got sick of the drama. Yes.
I suppose I should come to expect it, being involved in theatre and having most my friends involved with it as well.
I got sick of having to read about my friends instead of them coming and telling me things. I shouldn't have to look up your lives until after you die, not while you're still alive. I keep tabs on some. Others...no.


This is not a comeback blog.


When I was home this summer, I found the journals I was to keep for two classes during my first year in college. I intend to type them up and post them here. Nothing on the World Wide Web ever really disappears, much like the first law of thermodynamics. If something happens to this journal, at least I'll know that it's floating around out there somewhere and will never die.

Those two years at UW-Fox were the two best years of my adult life. These journals should speak for themselves.